In 2001, parents are far less likely to put up with the misery of missing their children growing up. The percentage has plunged from a quarter in 1998 to less than a tenth, although there has been a slight increase in those postponing or foregoing parenthood for the sake of their career, and many parents may feel forced to make the kind of radical changes that Hicks has chosen.

In 1998, almost 60% said they would not be willing to accept less money as the price of more time for their personal lives. In 2001, that proportion has dropped to 53.6%, with almost a third of women and a quarter of men being willing to trade pay for time.

This year, three-quarters of our respondents were male, and just over a quarter female - a big increase on 1998, when only 14.3% of the replies came from women. The gender divide remains in some areas: women report both greater workload pressure and greater job satisfaction than men, and men are twice as likely as women to prefer more traditional ways of working. But some older gender assumptions have been overturned. Asked if organisations would be more flexible with women in charge, only 16.3% agreed.

If our 1998 survey lifted the lid on the extent of our unhappiness with our work/life balance, our new survey reveals that we want to think big about the structure of our working lives, far beyond tinkering with the time we leave the office. And we don't trust the Government to help us out - more than half our respondents felt that government initiatives to improve work/life balance are either unlikely or not very likely to succeed - however well meant. Even so, nearly 70% felt that employers and organisations should be the ones driving change, while 33% felt it was up to individuals.

Seven out of 10 people feel that organisations should be the ones driving change. Less than a fifth think it is the Government's job

One of the biggest barriers to change for those organisations and individuals alike is that the kind of progress we want is radical, and requires a new set of standards and skills. We want nothing less than to be given personal responsibility to perform our work in whatever way suits us best. But that depends on all those new, soft and squishy notions like trust and empowerment, which are difficult to legislate for and almost impossible to measure. It isn't just our Satanic overlords who need to develop their EQ for the new world of work - our survey revealed some fascinating but damning results in the different ways we perceive ourselves at work compared with our staff and bosses.

The overwhelming majority of our managers - nearly 88% - say they are committed at work, and more than 80% describe their boss in the same way. Less than 60%, however, are equally convinced of their staff¥s commitment. Nearly 96% see themselves as trustworthy at work, and three-quarters feel their staff are completely trustworthy. The number who would trust their boss, however, drops to 62.6%. When it comes to flexibility - either in terms of personal adaptability to change or flexible working schedules - our survey revealed similar differences in the ways our managers see themselves and the people they work with. Three-quarters of our respondents consider themselves completely receptive to change at work. Only half think their boss is equally receptive, and even fewer - less than 30% - believe their staff are.

This personal paradox is one of the biggest barriers to change in the workplace. If we¥re still stuck in old 'us and them' responses to our bosses and staff, it¥s fair to assume that most of them are similarly stuck. The job of an enlightened HR department in the 21st century is to develop tools that help break down those responses and build genuine adult/adult relationships throughout the organisation. Those tools might begin with surveys and audits to measure levels of trust, autonomy and responsibility, and workshops, courses, information and support to help people develop them. Without those, we're stuck with a case of same book, different chapter, and all the flexible working in the world won't create the kind of deep change our managers are looking for.

Copies of the survey ЊWork/Life Balance: Whose Move Is It Next?¥ are available from Khyla McBride (tel: ; e-mail: Khyla.McBride)